When I first met the man who is now my hubby, I must admit – he had a really goofy sense of humor. I thought to myself, “This guy’s a little weird…I like that!”
We were unloading musical instruments off of the large step van that was used to haul the marching band’s instruments to the out-of-town football game. He was in the back of the truck, tossing instruments out, while I was standing on the parking lot, catching them. I’m not sure exactly what he was saying, but it was something like the names of each instrument backwards. That may not sound very funny to you right now, but just try it – “tuba” becomes “aboot”, and clarinet is even more distorted! And then he sprinkled a bit of “Far Side” and “Calvin and Hobbes” humor, and I was busting a gut laughing!
Before long, we were going steady, enjoying each others’ company and having a great time. Oddly enough, although neither of us were Christians, we didn’t smoke, chew, or go with those who do, so we got along quite well. Since I came from a feministic family, I was used to the woman running things, and so was he. So, as long as he did everything just the way I liked it, we got along together quite well.
But God had other plans.
There’s so much I could say about it, but the Lord worked in my man’s heart, and he gave his life to Christ and was born again! The change was dramatic – he was happier, more easygoing, and more loving. It SHOULD have been great…except…
He began to read in the Bible how the man is to be the head of the home, so he applied it to our relationship. Well, this was NOT what I was interested in! Suddenly he started making decisions, and I didn’t like it. Oh, no, not at all! Soon we began arguing, and it got worse and worse until we both decided to end the relationship.
For me, it was heartbreaking.
It took me months to get over it, but little did I know that the Lord used those months to work in my heart that I needed something: peace…joy! I was full of bitterness, emptiness, and loneliness, and I needed God desperately but didn’t know it.
I tried to find peace through alcohol, but that just made things worse. It wasn’t long before the grapevine sent the news of my new reputation back to my man, who was quite surprised. He thought I was a “good girl!” He didn’t know what was inside…
So one day, he called me up on the phone. Of course, those were the days when the phone was still a massive receiver that hung on the wall, and had a long springy cord attached. I was in my basement when he called, and I picked up the red phone to talk.
“What’s this I hear about you getting into drinking?” he asked. “I thought you didn’t do that stuff.” I was not happy that he called to bring me into account for my actions. What did he care? He had dumped me like a hot rock just 6 months ago.
Making a long story short, I responded with bitter barbs and thorough irritation, but he kept challenging me with the love of God. I found myself in a really odd spot – fighting against God! If you haven’t tried it, I don’t recommend it. It doesn’t work well!
So I had a three way conversation right then and there – with Kevin and I and God. I told God that I knew I was wrong in the way I’d been. In fact, I knew that it wasn’t what I DID that was wrong, it was what I WAS. I as a person was all fouled up all the way deep down, and I needed His help if I was ever to pull out of this pit. I wanted to give my life to Him.
There in my basement, while on the phone, I was born again.
Kevin and I didn’t start up a relationship again right away. Perhaps it was my pride, but although I wasn’t bitter toward him, I was a bit embarrassed to ask him to help me spiritually. But after a few days, I realized that if I didn’t have someone to study the Bible with and lean on for help, I would fall right back into the slime pit I had just been pulled out of.
And so we began studying the Bible together. Thankfully, there was no romance at all, just old-fashioned Bible Study. In a sense, it was a lot of the Blind Leading the Blind, because both of us began to learn together, but it was a good thing. We both needed the fellowship and encouragement.
Slowly, slowly, almost imperceptibly, we grew to love each other again. And God was at the center of our relationship. What a difference that made!
By the time we were going together again, I was all of 16!
I’m almost embarrassed to mention my age, because I was so very young to be in a serious relationship…but I hasten to mention that I had to guidance from my parents, and neither did he. But that’s another story maybe I’ll tell another time.
For now, I’ll say that the same humor that attracted me at first is still one of the things I love most about my man. I also appreciate the fact that he will not be manipulated, by me or anyone else. He does what he does because he fully believes it to be right – and I admire that.
Perhaps next time I’ll tell you about the unusual way he proposed!
Question: Do you think having God in a relationship makes a difference? How so?
- I have many people who follow along on my Facebook page for daily encouragements, reminders, and exciting assignments! It’s a great group of folks – come join us!
Lionproof: Keeping Your Children from the Claws of the Devil is OUT! It’s now available on Amazon, Barnes and Noble, and soon I will have it available here on TheCourageousJourney.com and Lionproof.com ! I AM SO EXCITED!
In this book, there is:
- Not just information telling parents why kids are going astray, but proven parenting practices that have worked for generations that are successful in raising godly children.
- Dozens of interviews from those 2nd generation Christians who KNOW what their parents did RIGHT.
- Charts and graphs detailing the results of the interviews
- Assignments to help the reader implement these principles in their own parenting.
- And much, much more!
Linking up with: Monday: Alabaster Jar, The Better Mom, and Moms the Word, and Happy Wives Club Tuesday: Titus Two Tuesdays, Mercy Ink Blog, The TimeWarp Wife, Messy Marriage Wednesday: To Love Honor and Vacuum